Valiant 11 to Sunbeam Sister, working on paper activity: Oh no, you scribbled over your name!
Sunbeam: Oh S***!
Overheard by: Concerned Teacher
profanity
Primary President during Sharing Time: Okay, boys and girls… What do you think it means when it says ‘I will not use crude words’?
Eight-year-old jumping up and down and raising his hand: Oooo! That like means like when some people say BAD words that you shouldn’t say. Instead you should just say ‘blank’ or ‘bleep’. Like, Oh my bleeping bleep!, or bleep bleep you bleep! or blank you blanking blank, or mother blanker.
Overheard by: Alice
Chick #1: You have to be in the mood for shrimp to be able to eat shrimp.
Chick #2: I know, right? I have to eat the whole shrimp because if I bite it and I see the brown stuff… it looks like crap and I want to throw up.
Chick #1: That is crap. You have to devein it… thats called deveining the shrimp. You take the crap out.
Chick #2: Yeah, it looks like crap.
Chick #1: Because it is crap. It is shrimp crap. It’s bad for you, too.
Chick #2: No wonder it always screws with my stomach… I’m being poisoned by shrimp crap.
Chick #1: Restaurants are poinsoning you with shrimp crap. Bennihana’s is posioning me with shrimp crap.
Overheard by: Sushi
Fire Truck Outside Chapel during the quiet stillness of the passing of the sacrament: [Loud Sirens]
Child in Pew: A fire f**k! A fire f**k!
Overheard by: Everyone in Sacrament Meeting
Primary Teacher: And so, hail rained down from the sky upon Egypt.
Sunbeam: Hail! I know that word, my mom is always saying ‘What the freaking hail!’
Overheard by: Charity Never Faileth
Boy: Come with me to do my testimony.
Girl: No… Sit down.
Boy: ****HEAD!
[Grandma grabs boy and drags toward door]
Boy: Don’t beat me!!
Overheard by: Brother Chris F****
