Young mother holding screaming child: Sorry, he just figured out he can scream, and he thinks he’s funny. I thought he’d be sleeping through sacrament by now.
Older Sister pointing to sleeping husband: They usually don’t start that ’til they’re forty.
Overheard by: Thomas S
Boy talking to mother: Hey, mum? I’ve got a new rule—be allergic to Satan!
Overheard by: Evil Hives
14-year-old brother sitting at computer preparing a talk: How do you cut and paste?
4 year old sister: Scissor and glue.
Overheard by: Paste Eater
Primary child saying prayer: …and we’re thankful for…
Sunbeam: Strawberries?!
Overheard by: Brother Berry
Primary teacher: What was Samson’s weakness?
7-year-old: Hot girls.
Overheard by: Riley
Daughter: Here’s a valentine I made for you Mom.
Single mom: Thanks. I love you, too.
Daughter: Did you read the bottom?
Single mom: Yes. It says Priceless.
Daughter: Oh… I thought it said Princeless.
Overheard by: Belated Valentine
Girl: My grandma died and then I got a new one and she got me this new dress.
Overheard by: She Has The New Car Smell
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